I don't understand. I don't know what a lot of people are thinking. but i don't understand, why is it that somehow i always feel whatever Kirsten is feeling.
I still remember last time. We had that free period before chapel. and everyone had crowded around Rini to talk about ghost stories. And I saw Kirsten trying to talk. She talk a bit. Then, suddenly, another girl at the far end started telling a story, all attention turned to that girl. everyone faced her. And Kirsten trailed off. I couldn't remember what i was doing. but i saw that look on her face. and i thought: i've felt like this many many many times. people just don't listen to you.
But of course, sometimes i am guilty of that crime. Sorry!
Well, these days, Kirsten addressed her blog to a particular unknown person. And i felt so...i don't know. Because i just felt the very same feeling. The day before cross country i cried and i couldn't sleep. I felt upset with someone. Because i felt our friendship was not working out. I felt ignored. I find that both of us are so different. And i felt that sometimes the words of that person hurt so so much. And when i thought about it, it just cuts cuts deeply into my heart. I remember the days where we used to be so close. i mean, last time we had so much fun doing things together. and now, i feel like that person only asks me to do things together when that person had no one elso to go with. and i felt that that person no longer enjoys being with me that much. and i resent being different. I just wanted to give up the whole friendship. and i just suddenly wished that person will ignore me altogether, so i don't have to face anything hurtful anymore. and of course, after crying it out i couldn't sleep. and went to cross country bleary eyed.
The hurt is all gone now. All. The both of us just started talking as normally and somehow, when we do that, i feel so happy. and well, i don't feel the gap.
I HAVE THE SUDDEN URGE TO LEARN GERMAN.
I still remember last time. We had that free period before chapel. and everyone had crowded around Rini to talk about ghost stories. And I saw Kirsten trying to talk. She talk a bit. Then, suddenly, another girl at the far end started telling a story, all attention turned to that girl. everyone faced her. And Kirsten trailed off. I couldn't remember what i was doing. but i saw that look on her face. and i thought: i've felt like this many many many times. people just don't listen to you.
But of course, sometimes i am guilty of that crime. Sorry!
Well, these days, Kirsten addressed her blog to a particular unknown person. And i felt so...i don't know. Because i just felt the very same feeling. The day before cross country i cried and i couldn't sleep. I felt upset with someone. Because i felt our friendship was not working out. I felt ignored. I find that both of us are so different. And i felt that sometimes the words of that person hurt so so much. And when i thought about it, it just cuts cuts deeply into my heart. I remember the days where we used to be so close. i mean, last time we had so much fun doing things together. and now, i feel like that person only asks me to do things together when that person had no one elso to go with. and i felt that that person no longer enjoys being with me that much. and i resent being different. I just wanted to give up the whole friendship. and i just suddenly wished that person will ignore me altogether, so i don't have to face anything hurtful anymore. and of course, after crying it out i couldn't sleep. and went to cross country bleary eyed.
The hurt is all gone now. All. The both of us just started talking as normally and somehow, when we do that, i feel so happy. and well, i don't feel the gap.
I HAVE THE SUDDEN URGE TO LEARN GERMAN.
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